


Original Sin

by considerate_skeleton



Category: Toward the Terra
Genre: Abuse of Authority, Dysfunctional Relationships, M/M, Rape, Telepathy, Victim Blaming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-04
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:14:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24941413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/considerate_skeleton/pseuds/considerate_skeleton
Summary: Matsuka was staring up at him. Eyes wide and wet and looking ready to burst into tears at any moment. He was weak and pathetic and -- and Keithhatedhow good that made him feel.
Relationships: Keith Anyan/Jonah Matsuka
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20
Collections: Nonconathon 2020





	Original Sin

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Hocchikisu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hocchikisu/gifts).



“They were right.”

Matsuka started, glancing over at Keith. It was the first time he’d spoken since beckoning Matsuka into his office as usual. And then, not as usual, asking him to stay.

Well, not asking. Ordering him to stay around, with no explanation. Matsuka couldn’t say he understood why, but he shrugged and ambled around the sterile office space while Keith went through a gauntlet of backlogged forms and messages. Occasionally, Matsuka glanced over at his commander. Keith seemed to be in an odd mood, but then, when was Keith in a normal mood?

Several times, looking out the window into the starry void beyond, he felt Keith’s eyes on his back. He didn’t turn around until he felt the nagging wavelength of Keith’s focus shift away from him. 

Then, apropos of nothing, Keith broke the silence like this.

“‘They were right?’” Matsuka echoed. “Who was right?”

“The men on this ship,” Keith continued, his gaze barely lifting from his work screen. His brow furrowed, and he signed off on something with an irritated flick before turning the display off and finally acknowledging Matsuka directly. 

Matsuka wasn’t sure if he liked that. The full weight of Keith’s attention was always intimidating. 

“What were they right about?” Matsuka said, since Keith obviously wanted him to ask.

A hint of a smile crossed Keith’s face for a moment. It wasn’t a kind one. “You.”

“What...were they saying about me?” Matsuka rubbed his arms, a chill running through him. Had he been figured out?

Keith reached over and stirred the half-empty cup of coffee Matsuka had brought him. It had long since gone cold. “I’ve been receiving numerous complaints that you’re a distraction for my crew.”

Matsuka frowned. “Pardon?” How could he distract anyone? It wasn’t like he was on close terms with anyone besides Keith. (As unusual as those close terms were.) He kept to himself as much as possible, and rarely spoke to the rest of the crew unless he was communicating an order from Keith. He only made meaningless small talk when courtesy demanded it. He’d spent his whole life learning to make himself small and unobtrusive. It was a difficult habit to break even in his new position of power - and one he didn’t really see a need to.

The spoon clinked against the sides of the coffee cup in harmony with Keith’s voice. “Understand something, Matsuka: As humans, Mother has elevated us beyond our old base urges. Things like...oh, say, lust. We have no need for it, and it lays dormant in the code that makes us up.”

A final clink, and the spoon fell to the saucer beneath the cup. A splash of coffee followed it, dripping onto Keith’s desk. Matsuka took an instinctive step forward to clean it off. Keith’s next words stopped him in his tracks.

“I hear the Mu don’t have that same control. It makes sense. You’re inferior in every other way; willpower is just another aspect of being human you’ve failed to master.”

Matsuka hovered between the wall and Keith’s desk, not enjoying where this conversation was going. “That’s...not true,” he said, sounding uncertain even to himself. 

There were feelings that Matsuka had...or maybe feelings wasn’t the right word. They were more like episodes. Episodes where his hold on reality slipped and he couldn’t help thinking of Keith with a strange, fervent fixation. His body would grow itchy with the need to spend that energy somehow. He’d always taken care of it in confused, shameful spells in the dark of night, holding his own wild thoughts as closely to his chest as possible.

Did humans not do that? Maybe they all had those desires, but unlike Matsuka, they had enough self-control to overcome them. Or maybe they never felt them in the first place, and Matsuka was yet again a sick aberration. 

“Explain, then,” Keith said, folding his arms on his desk and leaning forward. “Explain how numerous humans - professional, disciplined men - have found themselves fixating on you to the point that it’s become a point of contention among them. You’re not exactly a riveting leader, Matsuka. And while the complainants were reluctant to say it outright, the nature of their problem is obvious: You’re trying to seduce them.”

The accusation was so unexpected that Matsuka almost laughed in his face. “I’m doing nothing of the sort,” he protested. He couldn’t even remember the faces of most of the soldiers. What interest would he have in them?

“You may not be aware you’re doing it. You couldn’t keep yourself out of my head from the moment I met you,” Keith pointed out. 

“But...that...” Matsuka trailed off, horrified realization dulling his indignity. It still sounded ridiculous, but what if Keith was right? If Matsuka was truly full of unrestrained - and subhuman - urges, was he reflecting those onto the others he passed every day? Sparking inconvenient buried instincts in hapless bystanders?

“I thought I’d give you the benefit of the doubt and check for myself,” Keith said. His expression told Matsuka he was enjoying the series of conflicting emotions passing through Matsuka at the moment, no doubt evident on his face. So that was why he’d told Matsuka to hang around. Keith tapped his fingers on the desk for a moment, then continued. “And they were right. You really can’t help yourself.”

Matsuka’s stomach churned. 

The sound of Keith’s chair being pushed back was painfully loud. Keith stood and approached Matsuka. “What am I going to do with you?” He sighed, narrowed gaze meeting his aide’s wide-eyed stare. “You’re more trouble than you’re worth.”

“I...” Matsuka choked on the word. Already, familiar heat was crawling up his throat. He forced it down. Crying in front of Keith wouldn’t make the situation any better. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to...do that.”

“That’s your problem,” Keith snapped. His normally deep, level voice abruptly grew loud, and Matsuka flinched. “You don’t _mean_ to do anything. You wander through life with your head in the clouds, clinging to me and acting like a helpless, innocent little animal. When you’re a _monster_ who I should, by all rights, have put down the moment I saw your true nature.”

The words came out in a tumbling rage. By the time they were finished, he’d backed Matsuka up against the wall, fingers digging into his thin arms. And Matsuka - Matsuka was staring up at him. Eyes wide and wet and looking ready to burst into tears at any moment. Weak and pathetic and -

\- and Keith _hated_ how good that look made him feel inside.

Before he knew it, Keith was tearing at the clasps of Matsuka’s jacket. Keith had put him in that uniform. It was his right to strip it away. 

“Keith!” Matsuka tried to pull away. He wasn’t very successful. “What are you doing?”

“Disciplining you,” Keith answered, some calm returning to his tone now that he had control of the situation. Now that he had a course of action to get rid of this disgusting, covetous feeling. “If you can’t control yourself, you have to accept the consequences of your actions.”

“I - no, this isn’t what I wanted,” Matsuka pleaded.

Interesting phrasing.

“Good. Then it’ll be a lesson.”

“Keith, please!” Matsuka grabbed at his wrists, trying to push his prying hands away. The jolt of psychic power behind his grip didn’t go unnoticed by Keith. Nor did the frantic, clumsy suggestion that hit Keith’s mind at the moment of contact: _You're mistaken. You don’t want to do this._

That only enraged Keith further.

“How dare you,” he growled, grabbing Matsuka by his hair and dragging him over to the desk. “I gave you this rank.” He tore Matsuka’s uniform jacket from his shoulders. It didn’t come all the way off. It folded around the leather belt at his waist, tangling around Matsuka's forearms. Keith decided to leave it there. It would prevent Matsuka from moving too much, and the last thing Keith wanted right now was the mutant messing around in his thoughts even more. “I gave you this job. I gave you your _life_ , you little freak. And this is how you repay me? Forcing your will onto me-”

“I didn’t mean to!”

Keith slapped him. The sound echoed through the office. “I won’t tolerate lying from you. Especially not now.”

Matsuka sniffled. The pale skin of his cheek was already turning red. Keith’s body burned along with it. 

Keith bit down on his own lip, shoving back the wave of revulsion that came with the heightened urges inside him. This wasn’t his doing. This wasn’t his fault. 

His hand was still tangled in Matsuka’s soft curls. He pulled Matsuka’s head back and forced their eyes to meet. “Behave yourself, Mu.”

With that, he flipped Matsuka around and bent him over the desk, shoving his pretty face to the metal surface so Keith didn’t have to look at it.

Matsuka wasn’t helpless. He was shocked, overwhelmed, and scared out of his wits. But there was technically nothing stopping him from teleporting away from all this.

Nothing, that was, except for the fact that he had nowhere to go. The only place for him was at Keith’s side. Even if that meant he had to take this.

Matsuka’s heart pounded in his ears as Keith’s hands roamed brusquely over his hips and between his legs. This was...almost like what he’d thought about in the hazy visions that fueled his lust-addled nights. Except there was a world of difference between the Keith in his hopeless imagination and the one currently yanking his pants off. This was a side of Keith he hadn’t seen before. The man could be ruthless and cruel, but this felt too far. A primal part of Matsuka knew this was wrong. Even if the seed of doubt Keith hand planted had Matsuka questioning if this was really the kind of thing he’d been asking for all along. 

Was this the natural result of those urges? No wonder the impulse to act on them had been filtered out of humans.

Keith’s hands gripped the backs of his thighs hard enough to bruise. The contact on his bare skin caught Matsuka off guard. Without warning, a flood of emotions rushed through to him.

Anger. Frustration. Reluctance, practically forgotten. But sitting over the top of all those like a heavy blanket was arousal, red hot and strong enough to make Matsuka dizzy. Pressed against the edge of the desk, his cock stiffened.

“Disgusting,” Keith said. But he was pressed against Matsuka’s ass, and the hardness in his pants would be difficult not to feel.

“Stay there,” Keith ordered. Matsuka tensed as Keith pulled away from him, expecting to be hit again. Instead, he heard the sound of drawers being pulled open, then closed.

When Keith returned to him and started pushing something cold and wet into his entrance, it became horribly clear to Matsuka that Keith had been planning for this. It wasn’t some spur of the moment outburst. 

Just how long had Matsuka been affecting him this way? He hadn't meant to.

He repeated it like a mantra inside his head. _I didn’t mean to. I didn’t mean to. I didn’t mean to._ Each repetition had a different inflection, the words given all his care and focus, because otherwise he would have to think about the sharp, awful pain of Keith’s fingers pushing and twisting inside him. It hurt. It hurt, so much, but he didn’t mean to. He didn’t mean-

“Would you _shut up_ ,” Keith said. 

Damn. He hadn’t been trying to share the thought, but with how Keith was touching him, it didn’t matter. “Sorry,” he muttered, his voice scratchy and unsteady.

Keith made a disapproving sound. He made no move to stop violating Matsuka with his fingers. “Tell me, though. Is this what you wanted? What you’re so desperate for that you can’t help but beg me to take you like some animal?”

Matsuka sobbed. “It’s not.”

“You’re a terrible liar. You’re just lucky it was I who decided to take matters into my own hands. Or would you rather the other soldiers have you instead?”

“No!” Matsuka said. The idea sent an entirely new spike of anxiety through his chest. “I only ever wanted - it was just you-”

He’d said too much. He really was an idiot.

He felt Keith’s reaction to his words like it was his own. A swell of stunned affection immediately washed away by a tide of loathing. For himself or for Matsuka, Matsuka couldn’t tell. Honestly, it didn’t matter.

“I can’t believe you,” Keith muttered. He withdrew his fingers, but they were immediately replaced by something heavier and hotter.

This hadn’t hurt so much in Matsuka’s imagination.

Perhaps the scariest thing was the fact that Keith’s control was slipping away. It was what he was known for - what had gotten him so far in life. But now, he was coming apart as he shoved himself into Matsuka’s trembling body. His movements were uncoordinated, his hands shaking as they clenched bruises into Matsuka’s hips. But, more obvious to Matsuka, his mental shielding had all but crumbled away. With every jarring thrust, Matsuka’s mind was assaulted by raw, unfiltered feeling and sensation.

It was awful.

Matsuka’s own mind was already racing. Now, he had to deal with Keith’s point of view. What was pain for him was pleasure to Keith, and nothing in his life had prepared him to process that kind of paradox. 

Matsuka couldn’t hold back tears when he realized that what he’d thought was Keith finishing was actually his own orgasm. He waited for Keith to degrade him for it, but the commander didn’t even notice, he was so caught up in his own conflicted lust.

When Keith finally did finish inside him, the sensation transferred to Matsuka as overwhelming relief. Keith’s mind whited out for a moment of blissful nothingness. Matsuka wished they could stay like that a while. Just so he wouldn’t have to feel anything for once.

Keith practically collapsed on him, his chest pressing against Matsuka’s back. Keith hadn’t bothered to remove his uniform. He leaned so his mouth was at Matsuka’s ear, and spoke in a throaty, tired whisper that had a confusing undercurrent of warmth.

“I hate you.”

Matsuka shocked himself by managing a steady voice as he turned his head and replied, “The feeling is mutual, sir.”

And the thing was, neither of them were lying.


End file.
